Watford Rolling Road Shoot Out

   Saturday the 20^th July 2002 was the day where my car would yet again be pushed to the limit, only this time it wouldn’t be moving and I wouldn’t be sitting behind the wheel!

  In preparation for the big day I had hoped to get my Golf running as well as possible, after attempting to change the fuel filter and nearly splitting a fuel line I decided that it was running fine and there was no need to do anything else – how vary wrong I was.

  On Friday the 19^th July Lawrence, Kelly and I decide to clean our cars ready for the trip to Watford, out came the shampoo, polish, bumper treatment, chrome cleaner, a packet of fags and a cup of tea.  After about an hour and a half of cleaning the drive way was a wash with shiny paint, shiny wheels and shiny exhausts and we decided it was time to hit the pub.  We cut the pub visit short and turned in for our beauty sleep (not that we need any) in preparation for the drive at 7.30 on Saturday morning.

  7.30 finally came and after stocking up on drink and fags we hit the M3 with nothing but cruel intentions and poorly printed map (my fault!).  It didn’t take us long to get into Watford but finding your way around Watford was a different matter!!  Oh and hats off the testicularly challenged TW@ in a yaris that felt he would prove his small mentality by cutting both me and Kelly up where it really wasn’t necessary!  Anyway after following Kelly and Lawrence into a housing estate I realised we probably didn’t know where we were going!  A fag and a wipe of the wheels later we were back on the road and heading straight for the rolling road!

  At about 9.00am we turned a corner in a small housing estate and were greeted with a collection of rather nice Seats, on closer inspection they were only bloody Cupra turbos!  They looked wicked and as you will find out in a few paragraphs performed really well on the rollers.

  We both parked up and made our way round to TH where we found a mental sounding MK1 1.9 with mental cams just pulling off the rollers.  After chatting for a while with various people it was time for another car to go on the rollers…  This was to be an experience I will never forget!!  As they were strapping the car down I armed myself with a cigarette and a strong coffee.  The car started up, wheels started turning, speed reading climbed – 1^st – 2^nd – 3^rd, and I thought this isn’t so bad.  They let the revs drop a little to between 2500 and 3000 then floored it!  Wheels starting to spin at an incredible speed, 30mph – 40 mph – 50 mph, the air in the garage became hot and heavy with the smell of an engine singing a note it has rarely sung before – 4000 rpm – 5000 rpm – 6000 rpm.  People started to back off as the engine screamed for more then as soon as it started it stopped, bringing the rollers down to a stop the operator got out and gave it the thumps up!  At this point I was trying to slow my heart rate back down to a reasonable speed, I sparked up another fag wiped the coffee from my hand and my leg, pouring myself another coffee I wiped the beads of sweat dripping down my forehead and sat down…  And it wasn’t even my car on the rollers!

  As more cars were put on the rollers I became more at ease with the situation, then it was Kelly’s turn!  With the car strapped down the revs climbing and the sound deafening, Kelly’s little beauty kicked out standard bhp – not bloody bad for an 18 year old car!!  Feeling very happy for Kelly only slightly delayed the inevitability that it was soon to be my turn – in fact it was, at this point I sparked 2 fags and hit the black coffee!!

  I went and got my car, reversing it into the garage it became very apparent that we would have a problem – the bumper would foul the floor big time.  Lucky then that I have got a patented “quick release” bumper, off it came and we were ready to rock.   Bringing the revs and speed up as before it finally reached 3^rd, revs at 2700 wollop, its planted in third.  As I am standing holding my head in one and my bumper in the other my car looks and sounds fantastic but the power isn’t what anyone was expecting, and no not in a good way.  96.7 bhp a the wheels, down on standard and about 20-25 down one what mine should produce given the modifications I have made.  As the colour slowly drained back into my face I chatted to the operator who said straight away the timing is out, loads more people came over whom I trust implicitly and all agreed the cam belt was a notch out and the dizzy was over adjusted = SERIOUSLY RETARTED, no not me the timing.

  With my bumper back on me wagen and my photo taken I became excited at unleashing 20-25 bhp form me car by just sorting the timing.  I may not of had the figures I was after but I had a bloody result and a great day – Roll on the next one!

Click Here to see Kellys graph.                

See Johns graph Here.